April 23, 2002
Saint John, New Brunswick, Canada


2:12am. I just came in from the campfire. The Greenhead Gang left a bit after midnight. Today I talked to Patsy at the National film Board and Louie at Telefilm about grants. The NFB assistance proposal deadline was April 1st, but I didn't know about it until Walter told me yesterday. He said it was a soft deadline cuz she has a bunch to look at before she'd have a chance to see mine, and he was right; she said, "Just get it here soon." The Telefilm Grant was due today... but they pushed it to the 29th. I got work to do. It's challenging to think through these plans and work out every detail all in my head. To pull off a huge project like I got in mind takes commitment and organization. Life is gonna get very busy... and I can't just run off and play cuz it's nice outside... when so many people are expecting me pull though.

I have the skills... well not all them... but I just learn as I go. Somebody gotta do it... somebody gotta take responsibility for the way things are and make the changes that need to be. "Be the change you want to see"; I think Gandhi said that. Embody the message, don't preach... be the example.

I'm happy about where I am, but I do feel anxiety; I am on track... but I want to get on with it... to get everything in place. I need to delegate. You who are reading this. Please let me know if you want to help make a free summer camp open to all ages here in the Saint John area, something to strengthen the community and help people get freaky, so were not all stuck in our age segregated boxes sedated watching the boob and drugged like a zombies. I'm looking for folks who want to fine-tune their powers of mind and body make a movie about it.

If I don't sleep soon, my body will wear out. I'll end with an email exchange that got me stoked, and a song I've been singing over and over for two days straight. It touched a chord in me, bringing tears to my eyes(glad I'm not a robot), reminding me that I gotta send a letters to friends in Mexico, and Mike, who helped me big time on my journey south. I've been too embarrassed to write cuz it's been so long. Mike, if you read this before I write something nice and you pull it out of the mail box, I'm sorry my friend.

The following is a series of emails, starting with the one I just wrote, and going back in time:

My hip is sore from hitting a tree on the first run down a zip line I put up tonight. The tree is gone... and wow... you'll need to try it! I'll put photos on the site.

Yes.... I will be happy to take you to some amazing places. Let me know when is good for you.

Thanks... your email put a huge smile on my face. You are making my dream come true. It's about a life style for me... creating art for all to enjoy freely, and give when you can... or pass on the word... or whatever. Greed just keeps so much from getting done. There's lots to do that doesn't cost much. I want to live my life using as little money as possible. I want to get around... and I want to be with people who want what I can give. That's it. So thank you, and I look forward to seeing you again soon.


Hi Cory,

I was just talking to one of my friends that was with me in Fredericton, Lori. We were tossing around an idea of wanting to go hiking/camping somewhere new. Would you be available as our "guide" if we came down to Saint John? We'd of course pay you for your time to help out with your projects.

As far as what we're interested in...hmmmm....I like water so anywhere coastal is cool with me. It could be just 2 or 3 of us interested in doing this or more, getting a day or two where everyone has time off is the logistical nightmare, but I'll work on that.

Let me know. Lori and Rick (the other guy that you met) are interested in rock climbing, and all 3 of us would like to go kayaking sometime so we'll keep you in mind.

Have a great day.


PS. As the saying goes "The cheques in the mail" I mailed it this afternoon. I know that it will go to a good use.

Rob... thank you very much! Please stay in touch! I'll ask Kevin. Let me know about the climbing... and stay tuned to the site for info on the kayak trip. I'll email you info too. See you soon... and thanks again for the help. Enjoy... the site is huge and getting big and better everyday! My number is 635-4122. -Cory

Hi Cory,

I am one of the 3 people that you were talking to on the street in Fredericton yesterday while you were hanging posters (just before the Radical Edge, 2 guys and a girl)

I was just checking out your site. Very cool stuff. I admire anyone who has the fortitude to live their dreams. I was born with cerebral palsy so I know what its like to feel "different". My hats off to you and who knows I've always wanted to learn how to rock climb so I may be in touch.

I'm gonna send a check in the mail for $25 as a small donation.

Have a great day.


PS I was noticing in your Sea Kayaking Trip description that you mentioned Kevin Carpenter. This sounds like a friend of mine originally from Sussex/Penobsquis. If you wouldn't mind asking him if his birthday is Sept 14, 1967 cause we were born on the same day. If its the same person tell him that Rob Mills says hi. Thanks.

I've played Anchorage a dozen times today, and I'm gonna play it again... right now. The last song I played over and over was "The Littlest Birds" by The Be Good Tanyas. You can hear the song on their site. It's just a certain vibe that fits how I'm feeling. The words are good, but it's the music with it. I could turn it up as loud as it could go and it would make it that much better; it resonates with my whole being. I want to write songs like that--sharing how I'm feeling. Music is the essence life, celebration, freedom, expression. Sport scores and how much stuff is valued at means nothing to me. I want to feel something... love or fear... anything... just something that matters.

Anchorage, By Michelle Shocked

I took time out to write to my old friend
I walked across that burning bridge
Mailed my letter off to Dallas
But her reply came from Anchorage, Alaska

She said: Hey girl it's about time you wrote
It's been over two years you know, my old friend
Take me back to the days of the foreign telegrams
And the all-night rock 'n rollin'
Hey Chel, we was wild then

Hey Chel, you know it's kinda funny
Texas always seems so big
But you know you're in the largest state in the Union
When you're anchored down in Anchorage

Hey girl I think the last time I saw you
Was on me and Leroy's wedding day
What was the name of that love song you played?
I forgot how it goes
I don't recall how it goes

Anchored down in Anchorage

Leroy got a better job so we moved
Kevin lost a tooth, now he's started school
I got a brand new eight month old baby girl
I sound like a housewife
Hey Chel, I think I'm a housewife

Hey girl what's it like to be in New York?
New York City, imagine that!
Tell me, what's it like to be a skateboard punk rocker?
Leroy says, "Send a picture"
Leroy says, "Hello!"
Leroy says, "Aw, keep on rocking girl"
Yeah, keep on rocking

Hey Chel, you know it's kinda funny
Texas always seems so big
But you know you're in the largest state in the Union
When you're anchored down in Anchorage
Oh, Anchorage
Anchored down in Anchorage
Oh, Anchorage

3pm. I took this 1997 Ford Escort for a test drive, and it works perfect, but the price($9000) is a little too much.